Stoner was a birthday gift from Thumper and our friend Sandy; they chipped in and, using my new wife as their helper, bought him for my 34th birthday. He was one of the most thoughtful and loved gifts I've ever received, became a part of our family right off the bat, and when Alex was born he became a protector. I honestly never thought he would live to see fifteen, but he just barely made it. He was 3 months old when Char picked him up, which put his birthday sometime in late January.

I took him to the vet yesterday because he's been going downhill rapidly, and the news was what I was afraid of. A senior of senior dogs, his abdomen was filled with small masses, his heartbeat was erratic, breathing labored, gums nearly white from anemia, but his spirit was good. The vet thought he was likely in some pain, but not overwhelming, so I opted to bring him home so the kids would have a chance to come to terms with what was going to happen this week. I scheduled a re-check for Thursday to see where he was at, but when I told the kids how bad it is, they agreed it was selfish to wait. Alex especially did not want Stoner to suffer at all, and along the way Stoner became his dog, and his buddy. Stoner jogged with me, and looked to me as pack leader, but he was attached to Alex.

Alex spent last night on the living room floor with Stoner, talking to him, making sure his best friend knew he was right there, and told him more than once it was all right to go. Char and I reluctantly went to bed around midnight and let Alex stay there with Stoner; there was no way he was going to bed without the dog, and Stoner just didn't have the energy to move. At 4 this morning, Alex woke me up to tell me Stoner had died. He was sleeping as peacefully as he could, and just stopped breathing.

Part of me thinks I should have stayed up with Alex, but the bigger part of me knows he wanted to be alone, and that Stoner wouldn't have rested at all if I'd been there.

I helped him wrap Stoner in a bed sheet, and we moved him into the den before the other kids were up (Tank stayed with him; that is going to be one lost and cionfused dog for a while.) They knew before I could say anything that Stoner was gone, but neither wanted to see his lifeless body, and I get that. They also both wanted to go to school today anyway, because staying home would just hurt. Alex stayed home, and went with me when I took Stoner's body to the vet. He'll be cremated, and when we get the ashes back, they'll likely go on a shelf in Alex's room until spring. If he's ready then, we'll bury them.

Max once wrote a nice story about Stoner and how we came to have Tank. If you want to read it, it's here.