We spent the summer getting to know the area, getting the kids adjusted to a house much smaller than they have been used to, and helping them ease through the missing of their closest friends. Kevin and Rachel are thriving here so far, although he misses Elizabeth something fiercely, and she is having texting withdrawal. Alex has been unusually quiet, filled with an expected mixture of excitement and trepidation, torn between wanting to go home and wanting school to finally start.
We were prepared for this move to be the absolutely wrong move for at least two of the kids, and had agreed that if, by the end of summer, they were miserable, we would pack up and go home. But somewhere along the line parts of the US erupted in wildfires, and Craig called to let us know that while everyone was all right, our house was not.
I flew back for two weeks to address the damage, which was extensive. The house was not 100% destroyed, but enough that the only recourse was to have it razed to the foundation. We’ve made no decisions on rebuilding, because there’s no hurry to. But it removed the option of just going home; the kids are happy here, so it was less an issue as it could have been.
Craig and Frankie are fine; our affected neighbors are fine other than the loss of their homes. Alex’s main concern was Stephanie; her home was not fine, but she and her father have been able to relocate. Dack and Theresa, TK and Becky, they were all out of the path of the destruction. I’d like to say they are all fine, but Dack is not as well as he was when we first left, and I fear I will be flying back soon to be sure that I am able to spend some quality time with him before saying goodbye.
(I know he will read this; he knows his reality. He will snort that I don’t need to come back, but Dack is a brother of my heart, and I will. He may not need me to; I need me to.)
Earlier this week I drove Alex to school, where he will reside in the dorms; he threw up three times on the way there and expressed some doubt about the wisdom of his grand plan to achieve independence, and I resisted to impulse to tell him he wasn’t obligated to get out of the car and take those first steps. He’s only sixteen; granted, he turns seventeen in just a few days, but for right now he’s my sixteen year old son and I am not at all thrilled that he’s already halfway gone.
He has been generous in consideration to his mother and has called her every day, but has already gently warned her than once classes begin he probably won’t be able to. He has also promised that she would see him on weekends, and that Miko would see him every day and report to her if something seems wrong.
Still, he’s begun the process of pulling away. It’s the right thing, but that doesn’t make it sting any less.
Our intention is still to travel with Rachel and Kevin, but we’re not going anywhere until Alex is well settled into school, and then we’ll play it by ear. They’re making friends here and we’d like to see them dig in a bit before taking off. Brad is also a factor; while we travel he plans on staying in the house and taking care of the cats (four of them now) and the dog, but for the next few weeks he’s in South Africa with Nika and Peter.
I think they will be our first stop when we do decide to go somewhere.
All in all, it’s going well. And no, I’m still not telling you where we are. I will tell you that it’s pushing 1 a.m. here as I finish this up. That should narrow it down for you.
