They can stop now.

Just before Kevin turns 12, Alex will be eligible to get his learner's permit. He is under the mistaken notion that this is a given thing, and that on the appointed day, March 2, 2011, he will be taken to the DMV where he will take, and pass, the exam necessary to begin the process of learning how to drive. Granted, our lives will become somewhat easier once he has his full license, but there's that time in between getting the permit and getting a full license that will present more headaches than I care to contemplate.

His best friend has a learner's permit now, and they both keep pointing out how wonderful life will be when Evan turns 16 and has his license. In their imaginations, Evan has his own car and they're driving all over the place, going to parties, going on double dates. The reality is that we have graduated licensing and with that comes restrictions and curfews, and that doesn't include all the parental rules that will be heaped on top of everything else. Their disappointment will be palpable.

Evan's parents have no intention of getting him a car; he seems to think one will magically appear in the driveway on his 16th birthday, no matter what they tell him. He's done nothing towards earning the money to buy one for himself. We have no intention of allowing Alex to ride as a passenger with Evan until he has more experience behind the wheel, and the penalties for being caught as his passenger will be steep. He's been told this more than once, but he's 15; it goes in one ear and out the other so fast that I can nearly see his hair float from the gush of wind it generates.

Don't get me wrong; they're both good kids and trustworthy, but I was a teenage boy with a new license. I remember how stupid I was, especially behind the wheel. I remember how stupid my friends were--and I'm looking at you, Thump--when it came to cars. My life would be easier if we allowed Alex to ride from the high school to the college every afternoon with Evan, but that's not going to happen this year.

I fully expect to re-earn my World's Meanest Dad trophy.

A year from now, however, Alex will have a license, and based on the cash he's saving, he'll have his own car. I was on board with the idea of buying another family car, one he could use for school and to run errands for us, but not one of which he had control. But, I made the mistake of telling him that if he saved up enough, I would not only allow him to buy a car, I would match his funds. That was before I got a look at his bank balance, and I've regretted the promise ever since.

This is the part of parenthood I never gave the full weight of consideration to: my kids are growing up far quicker than I would like. Alex is on the cusp of driving; Rachel turns 14 in January and based on what we did with Alex, we'll have to fully open the door to dating, and Kevin is speeding towards puberty and more pitfalls than I suspect I can imagine.

We're trying to hold on as best we can, but they're getting away from us, and dammit, they're laughing at us as they go.

Laughing until the first time Alex wants to ride somewhere with Evan, anyway.